[Pixs of models for illustration only]
Sifu
Sabrina’s office door swings open. A sixty-something man (right pix below) enters and sits down in
the visitor’s chair across her.
Sabrina (pix above) looks up from her desk. “How can I help you?” She is wearing a strapless top
which makes her able to stop traffic in Bukit Bintang.
“I’m
Elvis, Sakura Siew’s husband.” He crosses his legs at the ankles. “Sakura’s
attracting lots of male admirers. What’s the cause?”
“Yes,
I know Sakura, haven’t seen her for a long time, though. Has she slimmed down?”
“Nope.
Still the same.” Elvis jabs a button on his mobile and shows the screen to
Sabrina. “This is her latest pix, taken in our bedroom.”
“Any
painting of threesomes in your bedroom? Like, three ducks, three swans?”
“Nope.”
“Any
mirror facing the bed?”
“Yes,
her dressing mirror faces our bed.”
“That
must the cause of men being attracted to her.” Sabrina pulls open a drawer. “Get rid of the mirror, and things will work
out fine.” She takes out an apple.
“A
mirror’s so powerful?”
Sabrina pulls out a piece of tissue from a box on the table. “Yes, be careful why you
place the mirror in your home.” She wipes the apple with the tissue.
“Any
tips about mirror placement?"
“Generally,
mirrors should be used to reflect anything good and nice.” She bites on the
apple (pix above). “Sorry, I skipped lunch and I’m hungry.” A pause. “Bad and ugly things
should not be reflected by a mirror. For instance, use a mirror to reflect a cash
register to double the money coming in and at the dining table to multiply the
quantity of food. A scenic mountain view
or beautiful lakeside view can also be reflected to double its beauty so that positive
chi can be multiplied.” She takes another bite on the apple. “If a mirror reflects drains, toilets, or a slum, remove it
immediately. Also, never use a mirror that has cracks. Looking at the distorted
image generates negative chi.” She plucks a piece of tissue and wipes her
hands. “When you’ve got rid of Sakura’s admirers, buy her lots of apples to
eat.”
“Why?”
“Apples
make a woman horny. It’s a scientific fact.” Her lips upturn in a smile. “Then you
can enjoy lots of sex with Sakura.”
“Horny?”
Elvis’ eyes caress Sabrina from her face to her decolletage. “Er, why are you eating apples?”
His eyes twinkle with insidious lechery.
“For
health purposes, you idiot! There are other benefits of eating apples! I know what’s on
your dirty mind!” She bolts to her feet. “This consultation’s over!”
/end
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