Wednesday, April 16, 2014
How despicable can this BN MP get! He posted photos of Karpal Singh's mangled face and dead body on his Facebook account!
Horrible! An utter disrespect for the dead. This BN scum posted photos of Karpal Singh's mangled face and dead body on his Facebook account. Who's he? Go to his FB account below:
"Decency" is not in his vocabulary. Is he fit to be MP?
Saturday, April 12, 2014
[Pixs of models for illustration purpose only]
“Hot Legs Nightclub &Karoke is the biggest night club in KL. Mr. Yap, can you tell me your secret of success?” I take out my MP4, switch it on and placed it on the table separating Johnny Yap and me. “Maybe, we can start off with your background?”
Yap straightens his necktie and leans forward. “I grew up in a broken home. My father was a drunk who was beaten half to death by my Mama with a frying pan. He fried horrible kwey teow, and was content with mediocrity. His fellow kwey teow competitors were earning decent money, but my Papa couldn’t even afford a helper. No business. So, early in life, I realized that the first principle to success is to pursue excellence. This has to do with inner drive and determination.”
“How did you get started in the nightclub business?”
“I started out as a bartender in a Chinaman nightclub in Pudu. During my stint there, I developed an ambition to own a nightclub myself. My burning desire was not to become a nightclub O.K.T. but a respected entertainment outlet owner. The poshest, the best in the city.”
“O-K-T? What’s that?”
“Ore Kooi Thau.” His expression was stony.
I suppress a smile. “Oh, I see.”
Yap pulls out a Cuban cigar from a silver case on his huanghuali desk. “My next step was to commit myself to a focused plan of action.” He drags out a fifty ringgit note from his wallet, lights it with an Alfred Dunhill lighter and brings the flame from the smouldering money note to his cigar. He puffs the cigar a few times and looks at me in the eye. “Someone wrote that there is no wealth to be found in an idea. There is only wealth by acting on that idea.” He drops the singed money note into an Remy Martin ash tray
“What was your plan?”
He blows cigar smoke upward. “First, to get the capital. Second, to get a licence from City Hall. Then I came up with hard-hitting tactics to achieve those two objectives.”
A busty girl in a miniskirt and a bare-back top enters the office and sets a bottle of Chivas Regal Gold Signature and two highball glasses filled with ice on the desk. She pours a splash of whisky into both glasses, bows slightly and says. “Enjoy your drink, sir.” Her 38-inch butt waggles as she walks away.
“Come, Ewe, Chivas Regal Gold Signature is eighteen years old. Excellent whisky.” He takes a sip of the whisky, puts the glass down. “First, I bought an abandoned warehouse and stocked it with three thousand new car tyres. I insured them for two million. A fortnight later, I set fire to the warehouse and collected a cool payout of two million.” He takes a long drag from his cigar. “Actually, the night before, I had removed the new car tyres and replaced them with old useless tyres. The new tyres were on consignment from a factory which I returned to them.”
“Wow, that’s err.. brilliant.” I take a sip of whisky, and almost gag on it.
“Then came the licencing part. The bugger from City Hall in charge of licencing was a lecher and a corrupt crook. I invited him to a karaoke session and brought Wati along. I told him to bring the nightclub application approval form for discussion. In the karaoke room, I handed him a bulging envelope containing you-know-what. The bugger came up with a song-and-a-dance crap about further approvals from higher-ups. So I used Wati as a bait. I told the officer to sign the approval letter there and then and offered Wati free for one night.” Yap snaps his fingers. “Poof! He took out the approval form, signed and chopped on it. Then I sent them to a hotel. Little did he know that Wati was wearing a chastity belt!” He burst out laughing. “What a sucker!”
“You already knew Wati before you started Hot Legs?”
“Her mother – her customers call her Mak Cik Gemuk – used to sell banana fritters by the roadside in Kampung Datuk Keramat. I always bought her banana fritters and became acquainted with Wati who was helping out at the stall. Around that time, I told Wati I would be setting up a nightclub soon and asked whether she'd like to work as a hostess. No hanky-panky involved, I reminded her. Training provided. She said yes."
“Then what? About the nightclub, I mean.”
“I wanted a strategic spot in Bukit Bintang. I was eyeing the premises of a restaurant at Jalan Imbi -- a big corner lot -- but the landlord said his hands were tied. Said the lease hadn't expired yet. So I rented an intermediate lot two doors away, turned it into a coffin shop and displayed several coffins in the pedestrian walkway. The restaurant immediately moved out and I took over the vacated lot. After the decorations, I needed classy girls to become hostesses. I didn’t want to employ –- ” His eyes roll upward for a moment. “What’s that three-letter word for an immoral woman?” He snaps his fingers. “Got it! H-O-R! Yes, I didn’t want to employ hors as my hostesses but decent girls bursting with sex appeal. So I poached Mummy Lulu, the best mamasan in the industry, from an el cheapo nightclub. When it comes to making friends with customers and separating them from their money, Mummy Lulu can teach Dale Carnegie a thing or two. She trains all our hostesses in this art and science.” He wags a finger to emphasize a point. “To succeed, you must surround yourself with the best talent. Hire the best not the cheapest. After five years, we moved here. So, as they say, the rest is history.”
“Thank you for your time, Mr Yap.” I switch off my MP4.
(Pixs copyright Ewe Paik Leong)
I'd just settled down on a chair in Kah-Soh Fish Head Nooodle & Seafood Restaurant when a waiter quickly appeared with a plate of acar and put it on my table. Then a woman handed me a menu. While engrossed in the menu, I speared pieces of the acar to eat. Then I realized that this tidbit might not be free, but it was too late. I ordered toman fish head noodle. When the bill arrived, as I had guessed, the restaurant had slit my throat by RM5 for a plate of acar I did not order. RM1 for a plate of nuts is within the bounds of decency but a tiny plate of acar for RM5 is excessive. What about the fish head noodle? It rates 2/5. When I left at 1.04 pm (as shown in the bill), the restaurant was still half empty. Never shall I step inside Ka-Soh again.
136 Jalan Kasah
50490 Kuala Lumpur
Sunday, April 6, 2014
[Pixs copyright Ewe Paik Leomg]
Norway Salmon Fish Head Noodles, despite its fancy name, is a hawker stall without a signboard. The menu is displayed on a wall -- only eight items are listed, together with colourful pictures. Side orders such as bitter gourd soup and hot & sour soup are shown on another wall. Adam Cheong, the owner, explains that salmon fish head is used in the curry fish head noodles as well. I order two bowls: the salmon fish head noodles and the curry fish head noodles. Service is pretty fast. The salmon fish head -– deep fried -- is more meaty than soong yee fish head. But the letdown is the soup. It isn’t as flavourful as that of other more famous fish-head-noodle eateries such as Goon Wah Restaurant in Kuchai Lama and Ikar in Bandar Menjalara. The curry version is a kissing cousin of regular curry mee hoon but the salmon fish head lifted the dish a notch above average. Considering the reasonable prices, Norway Salmon Fish Head Noodles is worth coming to. Rating: 3.5/5.
No 7 Jalan Jambu Hadapan
Dewan Sri Selima
51200 Kuala Lumpur
Adam Cheong: 010-4326867
(Behind Brem Mall at Jalan Kepong)
Parking outside the stall is relatively easy. As a last resort, you can park in Crystal Crown or Brem Mall and cross the road to the stall.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
[Pixs of models for illustration purpose only]
“There’s a hot gal in my office and I’m trying to get close to her,” Chow Kah says as he flips the menu. “Jess, you know all the tricks in the book on flirting. Any tips?” He looks up at the Myanmar waiter at our table. “Campari and soda. A plate of chicken tacos.”
I lean back on the sofa and look around the other tables in the hall of Hot Legs Niteclub & Karaoke. Most of them are taken up, while a few have “Reserved” signs. A new all-girl band is on today and Chow Kah, Hussein and I wanted to see them in action.
Jessica snaps her fingers at the waiter. “My usual drink.” She crosses her leg at the knees, and says to Chow Kah. “Flirting is an art that can be learned but it's not rocket science." She is clad in a red frilly bikini set, and long silky hair flows down her shoulders.
Wearing a polka dot bow-tie, the waiter -- scribbling on his notepad -- mumbles “Rose syrup with kacip fatimah” to himself and Jessica shoots him a glare for his indiscretion, her lips in a scowl. I smile to myself. A citrus aroma from the air-freshener wafts past me, making me feel alert.
Hussein, one arm around the shoulder of Wati beside him, asks. “Has she been introduced to you?”
“Yeah, that HR sonofabitch took her round the office and introduced her to everyone.”
“Sonofabitch?” Wati asks, eyes widening. She has on a red frilly bikini similar to Jessica's.
“That guy’s a jerk! Anyway, that’s a different issue. Please continue, Jess.”
“Rum and coke, lots of ice,” I say to the waiter, who scribbles furiously in his pad.
“Bintang beer, a big bottle,” Hussein says. He turns to Wati, “Darling, we share?”
I see Wati nod her head. The waiter strides away.
Wati says, “It pays to learn how to flirt, Chow Kah.” Her red lips part into a grin. “Successful flirting can lead to a first kiss!”
“Wow!” I mock.
“You can always start by paying her a compliment," says Jessica. "Her dress, her hair-do, whatever. You need not say it face to face. You can use office email or text her. At the conference table, during a meeting, you can also show her a thumb-up sign after she has made a presentation. Girls like compliments."
“I see,” says Chow Kah.
“Start a neutral topic to talk with her. Ask her hobbies, her favourite TV shows, movies and so forth. How she de-stresses or relaxes is an excellent opportunity you can capitalize on. She may go for tai chi in the evening, a morning jog or dancing. If you already know her fairly well, say you would like to join her. Don’t be shy. Remember, faint heart never won fair lady. There’re lots of one-liners you can pick up from the Internet. Sprinkle them in your conversation. Whatever you do, be yourself. Don’t try to project any fake image.”
“A macho hunk, a cool dude, a joker, a smooth talker. Get the drift?”
“Are dirty jokes flirty?”
“Well, depends on how it is said and in what context. Also depends on how close you are to her. If she’s on Facebook, it’d be better to post cute jokes or inspirational notes on her page. A time will come when you’ll know whether you and she have the right chemistry.”
A hostess with an hourglass figure slinks past our table and I give her an admiring glance. Jessica looks at me. “Maybe you can ask Ewe to write a few poems for you.” She looks back at Chow Kah. “You know, personalize them. Slip these poems somewhere in her desk where she will find them. Don’t leave them openly where other staff can see it. The other girls may tease her, and she may blame you. Some shithead bosses also don’t like office romances.”
Hussein snaps his fingers. “Her car windscreen, under the wiper!”
“Come on, quit the joking.” Jessica runs her tongue in her mouth for a moment. “When you’re out with her, use your body language to express interest in her. Gaze into her eyes once in a while or for longer than necessary but don’t stare like a maniac. In the intermediate stage of flirting, accidentally brush against her, and see her reaction. If she’s wearing perfume, move into her personal space. Take a sniff and compliment that she smells good.”
“But what if I get close to her and finds she has bad breath?”
I chuckle while Hussein guffaws and slaps his knees. Wati blows into her right palm and brings it to her nose.
“Make a joke out of it. Then offer to buy her mouthwash.”
There is a drum roll. The MC’s voice booms through the loudspeakers, “Ladieees and jeeentlemen, give a big hand for the Sex Kittens!” The curtain parts. Hoots! A thunderous applause! On stage are two busty girls plucking at their guitars and a drummer girl alternately bashing a snare drum and a rack tom. All girls are clad in skin-tight tops and mini-skirts. I turn and sweep my gaze at the other tables. A hundred pairs of eyes are bulging in their sockets. I look back at the stage to enjoy the performance.
Friday, March 28, 2014
[Pixs copyright Ewe Paik Leong]
The Ipoh sar hor fun soup served by Pavilion KL's Little Ipoh failed to make my list of top 10 sar hor fun stalls article which I wrote recently for NST. Costing RM8.50, the soup was bland and the amount of noodles was miserly. Also, the picture on the counter menu looked appetizing but when the real fare came, it was missing the yummy ingredients depicted. Hah, talk about fact and fiction!
Monday, March 24, 2014
[Pixs copyright Ewe Paik Leong]
Hakka Marble Restaurant is popular with Cheras folks for its Hakka Marble and stir-fried Penang assam laksa. I ate at this fan-ventilated coffee-shop when I was working on an assam laksa article for New Straits Times. I did not like the Hakka Marble but the stir-fried assam laksa caught my fancy. The dish consisted of standard noodles fried with laksa spices and topped with sliced cucumber, pineapple, red chilies and a prawn. Taste? A pungent taste with a sharp bite assailed my taste buds and a spicy aroma wafted out through from the nostrils. Rating 4/5
Consistency of quality is missing, however. When I returned a month later, the dish didn’t taste so scrumptious. The restaurant opens from 3 pm, and is closed on Tuesday. Rating: 4/5.
No.10 Jalan 34/154,
Taman Bukit Anggerik
Batu 7, Cheras
56000 Kuala Lumpur