Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Love-seekers who’ll be throwing oranges and bananas on Chap Goh Meh

[Above: Painting of Chap Goh Meh by Dr. Yuen Chee Ling
Below: Pixs of models for illustration purpose only]

College student Carol Chuah (pix below) curls her lips sensually and cooes, “I’m not desperate for a boyfriend as I’m still young.” A rose tint blushes her cheeks as she sweeps her eye lashes, vivacity sparkling from her eyes. “But I’ll be throwing an orange with my hotmail address on it in the hope of knowing a new handsome friend.”

Fifi Fu, (pix below), a beautician, exhaling breath like the smell of rotting fish, says, “I’ll be throwing one big box of lokam oranges with my HP number written on them.” Raising an arm to reveal scraggly armpit hair, she runs a pudgy hand through her silky crowning glory reeking with the fresh scent of shampoo. “But don’t fall in love with my face and body; instead, fall in love with my heart, spirit and character. No fat guys, please.”

“I was born in the Tiger year,” says Sifu Sabrina (pix below), enveloped in the sweet fruity scent of ylang ylang from her perfume, “so I’m only interested to meet either a Tiger man or a Dragon man. Moreover, his part chi or birth particulars must be compatible with mine.” She blows a kiss. "Muah!"

“I’m seeking eyes that will see beauty in me when I’m old and ugly,” says Jessica (pix below), scrunching up her face to look like a hag, “arms that will comfort me” –- she hugs herself -- “when I’m sick and a heart that will love me” –- she brings a palm to the left side of her chest –- “with all my faults.”

Squawking like an old rooster, Ang Mor Sai (pix below) says, “I’ll be driving one lorry-load of plantains or pisang tanduk to throw. I’ve hired two illegal Banglas –- they’re such cheap labour! -- to write my name and email address on each and every plantain. They’ll also be helping me to toss the pisang tanduk into the sea.” Guffawing like a DOM, he winks an eye. “I hope to get several new GFs with my costly but worthwhile investment.” His plastic front denture drops out. “Oops!” His hand flies to his toothless mouth.


No comments: