[Pixs of models for illustration only]
Angie Ang, (pix above) leans her butt against the edge of her desk. “What advice do you want, Alvin?”
“Miss Ang, c-can you give s-some dating tips for me?” Alvin Au says. “I-I want to find a girlfriend.” He covers his face with one hand.
Angie rounds her desk and plunks down in her swivel chair. “There’re four reasons why some men fail at the dating game.” Angie starts to raise her fingers (pix below). “First, body odour; second, shyness; third, being a cheapskate; lastly, cracking filthy jokes all the time. What’s your reason for dating failure.”
“I’m shy.” Alvin raises another hand to cover his face. “When I see a pretty girl, I-I would stammer or become tongue-tied.”
“Shyness cannot be overcome overnight.” Angie leans forward and rests her elbow on her desk. “You’ve to take small steps. For a start, you’ve to look your best, not like a song khor long from Balik Pulau.” She looks down at Alvin's slippers. “For instance, the wearing of Japanese slippers has never won a girl’s heart. Splurge on nice leather shoes and stylish clothes. When you look your best, you’ll feel more confident.” She hikes her chin. “Next, improve your body language. Don’t fidget, don’t slouch. Do make eye contact with the person you’re talking to, stick your chest out, chin up.”
Alvin looks at Angie from a gap between his fingers. “H-how do I build up courage to ask for a date?”
“Practise, practise, practise!” Angie’s voice flows like honey. “Go to any of the dance clubs or bars in Upper Penang Road. Say hello to as many strangers as possible –- the bartender, the waitress, the bouncer, a male tourist sitting alone. Exchange a few words on trivialities like the music, the DJ, the weather, the beach, anything. Also learn to smile. The idea is to loosen your tongue, so to speak. Do this ice-breaking for a few weeks until talking to strangers feels natural to you.”
“But I’m also scared of rejection.”
“You’ll have to change your attitude toward rejection.” Angie leans back and crosses her legs at the knees. “Rejection is not the end of the world for you. On the other hand, it should make you stronger. You can also learn some rebuttal lines for nasty rejections.” She rolls her eyes upward for a moment. “For example, if you ask ‘can I buy you a drink?’ and the girl gives a rude reply, say, 'you misheard me, I said you’re a ratfink' or 'I said your body stinks’.” Her lips upturn into a grin. “Get the drift?” She pauses. “You can also seek out the company of a male friend who’s extrovert. Go with him to a party or a dance club. When he strikes a conversation with a group of girls at the next table, try to jump on the bandwagon.” A little-girl giggle floats from her lips. "Monkey see, monkey do, understand?" She clears her throat and wags her forefinger. “Remember, only one friend, not two friends. When three people are together, and two are talkative, but the third is shy and quiet, the two extroverts will end up chatting between themselves and the third will be left out.”
His hand covering his face, Alvin looks at the floor. "Thank you for the tips."
“Come on, make eye contact with me, Alvin.” Angie sits up straight. “Take your hands off your face. Don’t be shy.”
“Yes, Miss Angie Ang, anything you say.” Alvin (bottom pix) shoves his hands in his pants pocket. "I'm going to Queensbay Mall tomorrow to buy some new shirts to dress me up into a lady-killer."
/end
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