[Pixs of models for illustration purpose only]
“What a blunder you’ve made!” Mummy Lulu hollers to her secretary, standing in the doorway.
Six rows of boxes are stacked ten feet high in one corner of the room.
Sitting facing the mamasan across her desk, I roll five calendars and tie them up with a rubber band. “Thanks, Mummy, they’re more than enough.”
“It’s not my fault, actually,” her secretary says. “Your instructions were not clear.”
Mummy Lulu shakes her head. “I said order year 2013 calendars not two thousand and thirteen calendars!”
“But you –- ”
An announcement interrupts the argument. “Okay, laaaaydies and jeeeentlemen, it’s time to get together,” the emcee of Hot Legs Niteclub announces.
“Come, let’s go, “ Mummy Lulu says. “We’ll discuss the calendar boo-boo later.”
All the patrons, GROs and staff tootle to the dance floor and start to form a circle. From the VIP Karaoke Room, Chow Kah elbows his way to stand beside Jessica [left pix] and I manage to get a spot on her right. Arms across our chests, we link hands.
Scrambling through the crowd, Hussein falls face first on the floor trying to get beside Wati [centre pix]. She's wearing a black top with plunging neckline and a tinsel hat. Tough luck, two guys are already holding her crossed right and left hands.
Belinda [bottom pix], the post-op transsexual, picks Hussein up -– who has broken a front tooth -- and makes him hold Mummy Lulu’s hand. Belinda grips Hussein’s hand.
Chow Kah’s Papa, Ang Mor Sai, flashing a lecherous grin, reaches to hold Mummy Lulu’s other hand.
More than 30 patrons and the rest of the GROs -– numbering more than 20 -- complete the circle. The clock strikes twelve and the party sings Auld Lang Syne.
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind ?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and old lang syne ?
For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup of kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.
And surely you’ll buy your pint cup!
and surely I’ll buy mine!
And we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.
We two have run about the slopes,
and picked the daisies fine ;
But we’ve wandered many a weary foot,
since auld lang syne.
We two have paddled in the stream,
from morning sun till dine;
But seas between us broad have roared
since auld lang syne.
And there’s a hand my trusty friend!
And give us a hand o’ thine!
And we’ll take a right good-will draught,
for auld lang syne.
Red, blue and yellow balloons and confetti drop from the ceiling. “Happy New Year!” everyone yells!
Chow Kah, wearing a tinsel hat, starts to lean forward to kiss Jessica. She backs away and puffs with all her might into a paper blowout which hits Chow Kah’s pompadour. His wig comes off!
“Huahaahaahaahaahaa! I never knew you were bald!”
Face as red as a lobster, Chow Kah picks up the wig from the shiny, marble floor. He sticks it back on his scalp.
Mummy Lulu’s office staff distribute special colourful crackers -- each about six inches long -- containing personal items of the GROs to the guests. Each item has a tag with the name of the GRO.
Ang Mor Sai pulls his cracker and out pops Mummy Lulu’s panty hose! Draping it around his neck, he catches the aroma of musk, and he starts to dance with her.
Hussein tugs his cracker apart – BANG! -- and out comes Wati's handkerchief stained with cherry-red lipstick. The words "Wati" is embroidered on the hanky.
Chow Kah mumbles "Amitofu" a few times and pops his cracker. Out leaps Jessica’s stocking which exudes the fruity and spicy notes of Dior fragrance. Jumping with joy, he brings the stocking to his nose, balls it and keeps it in his shirt pocket.
I pop my cracker and receive -- of all the damnest things -- Belinda's socks!
The music plays, the booze flows, the buffet is attacked and everyone turns into party animals.
/end
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