Sunday, March 20, 2016

Women tend to fall in love with their ears, says Angie Ang, Penang’s romance consultant

[Pixs of models for illustration only]

“Thanks for coming, Mr. Tony Tze.” Angie offers her right hand. “What’s your problem?”

Tony grasps Angie’s hand lightly and plunks down in the visitor’s chair. “No girlfriend!” His lips dip in a disappointed curve. “I wonder what’s wrong with me?”

Angie assesses Tony (right pix below) through mascaraed eyes. “You’re a college graduate? Got stable job?”

“I’m a draughtsman. Love dancing and adventure sports.”

“Any typical male vice? Drinking, smoking, gambling?”

Tony gives a shake of his head. “I’m a homely person. Social drinker, non-smoker and non-gambler.”  In Angie’s mind, his voice conjures up an image of a trapped rat squeaking in a cage.

“The problem is your voice!”

“Oh? What’s wrong with it?

“It’s too squeaky. Women are attracted to men with deep voices. Evolution has programmed  women to select  a mate with a deep voice as it indicates genetic fitness. Having said that, men with deep voices don’t necessary win all the time in the marriage stake. A few women perceive baritone-voiced men as cheaters or Casanovas; therefore, they regard such men as only suitable for a fling. On the other side of the coin, a male voice that’s too husky turns women off as it projects aggressiveness. To moderate a husky voice, a man should control his voice to be breathy." 

“What you've said supported by scientific research?”

“Yes! MacMaster University, Aberdeen University and Northumbria University have conducted studies on the attractiveness of male voices to women. Their results have been consistent." Angie adjusts her spectacles with a forefinger. “As an aside, women with high-pitched voices and men with deep voices have also been found to be more promiscuous.  They’re also likely to be sexually active at a younger age.”

Tony wrings his hands. “Great balls of fire! I must start looking for women with high-pitched voices!” The ends of his lips tip upward in a grin. “But first, how can I improve my voice?”

“Why don’t you check out wikihow dot com? There’s an article that teaches you how to improve your voice. So, other things being equal, a man with a rich voice has an edge in romance over the squeaky-voiced man.” Angie stands up and extends her hand. “Best of luck!” Her high-pitched voice flows like sweet warm honey that sends a tingle down Tony’s crotch.


No comments: