[Pixs for illustration purpose only]
“My goodness…Anwar Ibrahim is in trouble again — another sex scandal,” uttered Chow Kah, flipping through the pages of a tabloid spread on the table in front of him.
Jessica, a nightclub hostess (aka GRO), leaned forward to read the news, exposing her delightful breasts as if waiting for a mouth to suck the tight nipples.
“He’s in his sixties already and still going strong huh?” added Hussein, puffing away at a cigarette. “I think he consumes Tongkat Ali or goes for urut batin regularly.”
“Can someone tell me what's urut batin? “ I asked as I turned the pages of a song menu. The karaoke microphone laid on my lap.
“Aiyaah…it’s a special deep-tissue massage for the male equipment lah.” explained Aryati, a voluptuous GRO seated beside Hussein. Encased in a sexy halter top, she was wearing little shorts in sequins that exposed her smooth cushiony thighs to the hilt.
“Done by men or women?”
“Depends on the therapist lah, but mostly men,” said Aryati
Hussein pretended to puke. “Yeech! That’s repulsive. Only a gay would feel comfortable with that sort of treatment.”
“Actually, there are other options available,” explained Chow Kah. “Heard of sexflexology? It’s foot reflexology that targets the meridian points of the sex organs. But, for me, I don't go for such troublesome therapies. My wife often double-boils old cucumber soup with tongkwai and red dates for me. It has worked wonders for our sex life.”
“Really ah? Those herbs work?" I asked in amazement. "By the way, have you seen Professor Robert Looi’s advertisements in Harakah?”
“Who’s he?” asked Hussein.
“Inventor of many men’s sexual health products,“ I explained. “He’s even got a signboard on a lamppost in Chinatown.”
“Heeeheeheehee!” laughed Aryati. “How can a political newspaper stoop so low as to accept such advertisements?”
“Isn't it haram?” sneered Jessica. “After all, the PAS people are very keen to close down massage centres and karaoke clubs, and make us poor gurls jobless! So, sex-related product advertisements should also be haram, rite?”
Chow Kah poured beer into his mug from a jug. “Hey, ladies, let’s not stray to politics.”
“Right, I agree,“ said Husssein. “Now let’s talk about durian. Do you know that it’s an aphrodisiac? My grandpa back in my kampong used to say that when the durians are down, the sarungs are lifted up!”
“So, in the cities, when the durians are down, pants are dropped down?”
“Ah…this evening I belanja you guys durians,’ interjected Aryati.
Jessica added: "Let's ask a waiter to go to Jalan Alor and buy several!"
As I suspected the two gurls were up to something, I quickly left the karaoke room with the excuse that I didn't find any nice songs to sing.
/end
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