Boss barked like a dog

When my buddy, Lee Ah Boo, first came to Kuala Lumpur from Peanng, he worked for a British company in Jalan Raja Chulan. His boss, a Mr Patrick Brown, was only 160 cm tall, half-bald and fat.

Because of his lack of height, he had an inferiority complex and would humiliate his staff who were taller than him whenever opportunities arose. Lee, who was the tallest in the office, bore the brunt of Brown's tongue-lashings.

On one occasion, Lee made a booboo in some invoices. When the client complained to Brown, he hollered at him in a voice that could be heard from one end of the office to another. That was the last straw and Lee decided to get even with Brown.

Lee made a bet with his colleagues that he would make Brown bark like a dog. If he won, they would have to buy him a ten-course dinner at the Shangri-la Hotel.

The next morning, Lee went to se Brown.

"Yes, anything?" asked Brown.

"I need your advice, sir," said Lee.

"Oh, about what?"

"Lately, there has been a spate of burglaries in the area I am staying," said Lee.
"My neighbour's house was almost broken into two nights ago, but luckily, he keeps a dog. When it saw the would-be burglar, it barked and this frightened him away."

"What's this got to do with me?" asked Brown.

"I understand you're an animal lover, sir."

"Yes, I love dogs."

"Then I hope you can share your knowledge of dogs with me," said Lee. "I went to the SPCA yesterday evening to look for a dog. There were many dogs which appeared suitable as watchdogs. But one dog caught my attention as it was tall and muscular. Unfortunately, its bark goes Yau! Yau! Yau! Sir, do you think it will make a good watchdog?"

"By Golly, it won't," said Brown. "A good watchdog should bark Woof! Woof! Woof! Yowling dogs are useless for scaring off intruders."

As Brown's door was open, Lee's colleagues overhead everything and sniggered at the way he had won his wager.

A week later, Brown's eye developed an infection. As he was leaving his home to see a doctor, he accidentally stepped on the tail of his dog. It nipped him in the ankle, tearing one leg of his trousers at the hem.

After Brown had his eyes examined by the doctor, he asked for some ointment for his ankle. The doctor asked what had happened and Brown told him.

In jest, the doctor said: "Perhaps your dog has an eye infection too and can't see well. Otherwise, why should it bite you?"

When Brown got home, he thought about the burglaries that Lee had told him.

"To guard my property, my dog must have good eyesight," he told himself.

So he shared the doctor's medicine with his dog, including dispensing eye drops in the animal's eyes.


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